Éire Literature

I was recently asked the question “Is Love an Option” by one of my close friends. Although I wouldn’t say I’ve experienced the cliche version of love that we all know it to be. I’ve experienced many different types of love: familial, platonic, and a type of romantic affection. Love comes in all shapes and sizes, but do we really know how it starts? Having a crush or being attracted to a person can come naturally or be all consuming, but love doesn’t follow that same criteria. Love is slow and almost goes unnoticed until you find that it’s already there. I’ve watched everyone around me fall in and out of love over the years, and it honestly never looks appealing. I’ve watched my friends fight over trivial things with their boyfriends but refuse to see their flaws at the same time. Once I decide to question them, I always get the same line: “You’ll understand when you’re in love.” 

This remark used to irritate me; I felt like a child being scolded by an adult for something I couldn’t comprehend. Since I was young, I’ve loved the idea of romance, whether it be in books or films, I couldn’t get enough of it, but the way love is interpreted in these forms is very different to the real world. Love is scary and unsettling; you never really know the outcome. Yet we still continue to love as much as we can, over and over again. Maybe it’s humans that have this affliction; we are made to naturally crave love. Some have a worse affliction than others and take whatever they are given. Even the phrase “I love you” is confusing. It’s commonly said between friends and family, but when it comes to romantic relationships, no one has the answers. Everyone I know has said the phrase at different points in their relationships, and every single one of them still doesn’t think they got it right. Too early or too late, or the wrong timing altogether. Why is it that these types of relationships are so hard to navigate? Even the sayings regarding love make it sound unnerving: “Love makes you crazy” or “Love conquers all.” 

For those like me, who haven’t experienced this form of love, it sounds frightening and controlling. Romantic love from an onlooker’s perspective doesn’t look pretty or desireable; it seems like something no human on earth has fully figured out. Every piece of literature I’ve read has been influenced by some sort of love, and it always ends with tragedy or change. All of these factors seem to indicate that love is necessary to human life and progression; everything we do involves love. Whether it be protecting our families, hugging our friends, or being with the ones we love. Even if I decided that love was an option, it seems as though humans can’t help but pick love again and again.